Happy Anniversary To Us
On November the 3rd I sat on Dan’s lap, held the camera at arms length and look a picture of us together… it’s now four years, two children and about 15kg (and that’s just me!) later! I love this picture, it’s a snapshot of the day all of this began, plus I look smokin’ hot, I wish I still had the time (and inclination) to keep my eyebrows that neat.
Mum has taken the day off to go shopping, so we don’t have any grand plans. Declan has been superb today so I was able to make some cupcakes with heart sprinkles to mark the day, Dan has celebrated by watching sci-fi shows in the morning and going to sleep in the afternoon 
Birthday Wishes
One day late, but a very Happy Birthday to my big sister, Jenni! You are a rock star!
My Life In A PNG
This is an accurate portrayal of my life right now, and unfortunately I can’t hit that damn panic button! I’ve taken a week or so off since Mum arrived and now, starting tomorrow, I have a huge amount to catch up on. I still have a commission to fill for Jovis, some stuff to post off, a toddler and a foetus to look after, emails to reply to, posts and recommendations to read and of course CraftBlog to write, as well as taking it as easy as possible!
Mum has become my live in housekeeper which has taken a massive weight off my shoulders, we might even leave the house in clean clothes now! Declan is absolutely in love with her, although it took a couple of days to get to that point, it’s nice hearing him calling “Nanna???” in the mornings from his bedroom as opposed to “Maaaaamaaaaa?!”. She’s also taught him how to say “cock-a-doodle-doo”, which is apparently far too much effort for him, so instead it’s just “Ca-dooooo!”, he’s now his own little farm since he’s perfected sheep and pigs as well. He’s also just started saying “HIYA!” as soon as he enters a room, and a just as enthusiastic “SEE-YA!” when he leaves. What happened to my tiny helpless baby?
As far as #2 goes, he/she may have some names but I still think it’s going to be a last minute decision. Lets just say that they certainly weren’t any suggested in response to my previous post! Sorry guys, but you suck when it comes to naming my child 
I came up with a better response when I Declan opened the baby name book and pointed at one he wanted. I’m feeling a lot better than I did last week, but still meant to be taking it very easy, I have another appointment on Friday so we’ll see if anything has changed then.
EeeeeeEeeeeEEEEEEEEE!!!!*
I spoke to my Mum last night and found out that she will be landing in my adopted home country in FIFTEEN DAYS!!!! It’s all been very up in the air about what’s happening, my Nan has been very sick and I know Mum is feeling very torn over who she should be with, I’ve been panicking about the possibility that she may not have been able to make it out here before the birth so last night’s news was a complete shock. I am superbly chuffed and sooooooooooooo excited about seeing my Mum again… not quite so excited about sharing a house with both her and Dan for three months, but at least they should give me some good blog fodder 
*This is Declan’s excited noise, as soon as anything exciting happens he breaks out in the “EeeeeeEeeeeEEEEE!!!”, Dan came home last night whilst we were reading a bedtime story, D heard the key in the door and straight away leaped off my lap with a cry of “DADDAAAAA!! EeeeeEeeeeeEEEEEE!!!!” and then all I could hear was him pelting it full speed down the hall in his little Thomas The Tank Engine slippers to go and greet Dan and get lavished in attention. I think it’s a fabulous noise to make when you’re just so excited you can’t think what to say.
AFW Meet Up
Today was the AFW meet up, where I got to eat much chocolate (probably too much) and have some superb conversation with some lovely ladies, Riayn, Christie, Leigh and Veronica. We got to talk blogging, geekery and just about everything else under the sun, and I have to say, it was a wonderful change to have a conversation that didn’t involve discussing Sesame Street or drool.
Leigh and I shared a chocolate, banana, marshmallow and pecan pizza, and I was reminded just how much I love blogging, the plate was barely set down on the table before EVERYONE had pulled out a camera to photograph the crazy chocolate pizza, bloggers have no shame in looking moderately insane for a good photo and something to write about. It was so tasty, but very rich and probably more suited to four people sharing it instead of two. Infact I think that was the case for most of the food there, just a hot chocolate was giving me a sugar high.
It was a great couple of hours, and was nice to put some faces to the names behind the blogs - unfortunately Veronica is missing in the photo as she left before I got up the courage to ask a stranger to take a picture of us. I had a wonderful time and there’s already talk of a get together for “High Tea” in the city, hopefully with a couple of new faces, good company and good food - this is a regular event I could quite get into!
I returned home to find Dan as sick as a dog, whatever I had over he last couple of days he seems to have caught, and I’m starting to suspect Declan might have it as well as he’s far more sooky than his usual self. It should be lots of fun at our place tonight.
Not Nigella And Journeys With The Black Dog
I’m under instruction from my husband to blog as a way to get myself back on track, writing online has been an outlet for me for almost ten years, so hopefully it will be exactly what I need to get myself back to my happy place.
My big sister and her family came to visit last week from New Zealand, we had a fabulous time, such a good time infact that I’ve decided to bottle Jen and keep her in my pantry for when I have crappy days. I was absolutely on top of the world whilst they were over here, but then slumped fairly significantly as soon as they left. Fortunately I’m now past the high risk stage for taking Zoloft during pregnancy, so I have an appointment on Thursday to refill my prescription which should hopefully be another step towards screwing my head on straight.
In Declan news, he is on week three of a hunger strike, last night his food for the entire day was half a crumpet, four Cherios, a quarter of a ham and cheese butty, three pieces of gnocci and a few bits of chicken. He’s not fading away yet and isn’t complaining about being hungry at all, it would just be nice if he could eat more than a few mouthfuls at a meal. On a happier note he’s picking up words constantly now, the most recent one is if you offer him a cuppa (as in tea) he’ll eagerly respond with “puppa!”. The cutest so far is if you say “WINN4R!!!” to him he’ll throw his hands above his head and yell “NAAAAAAAAAAR!!!” back at you. I don’t know how I still live in a black fog with him around, it’s like having a live in jester, and yet I’m still managing it. Score one for Fern.
Something Else He’ll Mention To His Shrink In 30 Years Time
Dan started a new job in mid February, he’s been working late a lot of nights and doing a great deal of overtime on the weekend, he loves the job and was nominated by his colleagues last week as “Employee Of The Month”, but the official title is much better than that and makes it sound a lot less like he works in a fast food joint, but I’m pregnant so obviously the brain cells that contained that bit of information leaked out of my ears last night as I slept.
Now I expected me to turn into a babbling mess over being alone so much, what I didn’t expect is just how badly Declan would react to it. Declan loves his Dad, absolutely adores him, and previously Dan worked from home so they spent a great deal of time together, I figured it would be a week of adjustment and then he’d just come around to the idea of only seeing Daddy in the mornings and at weekends.
Apparently my son is far more sensitive than I thought, and instead of getting better he’s getting worse each week about Dan leaving. He’s hysterical when Dan leaves in the morning, the moment the door shuts he’ll start screaming, all he has to see is Dan putting on his shoes and he’ll latch onto his leg and follow him around like a puppy. Then in the second week it became refusing to let Dan out of his sight ever, the poor bloke can’t shut the toilet door or take the rubbish out without the baby sitting on the other side of the door sobbing. Now he’s started waking up constantly through the night - originally from his molars coming through, but now I think more out of habit, we’ll calm him down and lay him back down to go to sleep, but the moment he sees the door shutting he’ll start crying uncontrolably again, we’ve tried leaving the lights on, we’ve tried leaving the door open, but as soon as one of us walks away then all hell breaks lose.
Last night, after almost three hours of this Dan had a brain wave and gave me his watch, the numbers and hands glow in the dark and Declan loves to watch it if Dan’s holding onto him trying to get him to sleep. So I strapped the watch onto one of his soft toys in the crib, put him down, walked out and actually managed to shut the door behind me, after two weeks of him waking up anything up to five times a night, he slept right through till morning. My big nancy boy just misses his Daddy, if it wasn’t so sweet I would be mocking him considerably right now.
I hope this gets better soon, I just can’t work out how to explain to someone who’s vocabulary consists of “Mum”, “Dada”, “Hello” and “Oh Dear” that Dad doesn’t disappear forever when he shuts the door.
I know I’ve said it a million times, but a puppy would have been much easier.
Baby Two: Electric Boogaloo
Time to come clean for those either not in my imediate family (excluding one of my sisters who my mum still hasn’t told - sorry Sue!) and for those not on facebook, we are due to bump our family number up to four at the beginning of october, unfortunately not with a puppy, just a boring old baby 
That’s right, I’m currently about nine weeks knocked up with baby number two, making me due on the tenth of October, Dan and I are very happy but so far Declan seems less than impressed about the whole thing. So far things have been far easier than my first pregnancy so I hope that’s a sign of good things to come!
Facebook Highs
I LOVE FACEBOOK! I just found (well actually they both found me!) two friends from year THREE, we met when I was seven, and they did a hell of a lot better than me because they actually remembered my surname! It’s amazing, it makes me want to go back to the UK and hang out with all the friends I lost with each school change. Lately I’ve been hit with such a strong sense of homesickness, I think if the option came up tomorrow I would probably move back to the UK, I know I would regret it fairly quickly, but recently I’ve been longing for the sense of history and past that I just don’t have here.
Anyway, onto facebook etiquette… I just did a quick search and found my next door neighbour, we get along okay, she invited me over for a girly candle party when we first moved in, I’ll chat to her or her husband when we see each other and I baked them some cookies for Christmas. She has a son a few months older than Declan and she’s expecting another boy in March (IIRC) so I would like to be friendly with her, because that’s about the only person that I know who has a child, but I don’t want to be pushy, would adding her be seen as kinda stalkerish and definitely pushy, or would it be seen as the first step to becoming friends?
Facebook Woes
This is probably a topic I should leave until I 1)haven’t drunk half a bottle of wine, 2)have more time to write and 3)have slept more than 10 hours in the past two days. BUT, I’m starting to think facebook will be the downfall of me. I go from happiness that I’ve found someone who I haven’t had contact with in years - which is a great deal of people, to a horrible bitter jealousy that they’re out drinking and having fun and I am married and have a baby, to distain when I see that it’s been six years since I last saw them and they’re still sitting in Bristol getting stoned with the same old people and going to the same old clubs.
I love my life, I love Declan and I love my husband, but I miss partying, I get upset most times I talk to my friends from college so I just avoid speaking to them, we’re in two completely different places in our lives so it’s hard for either of us to relate. I go through days when I kick myself for making the choices I’ve made, and other days when I look at what they’re doing and thinking just how much more rewarding what I’m doing is, how many of them can claim that they can recite episodes of Sesame Street verbatim of that the highlight of their month is sharing a bottle of wine with their mother-in-law! Overall, I enjoy what I do, I enjoy my day to day life, but I wish I could just forget everything for a weekend, go clubbing, get ratted, pull and experience the freedom and lack of responsibilities that my friends from college are experiencing right now.
Sometimes I would really like to take off the grown up hat and be a brat for 48 hours, just to get it out of my system
I'm a twenty something WAHM, originally from England and now living in a land downunder.
